Day 20 - I look at his picture. I can still see his smile, feel the warmth of his eyes. I reach out to it and imagine that I can feel his whiskers, those whiskers that scratch and tickle. The ones that always make the babies wince and giggle. The ones I have asked him repeatedly to remove to reveal the soft smooth kissable cheeks and upper lip. Right now, I would take the face whiskers and all. He is joy for me. Looking into his face warms my heart. His laughter and wit, I could never say the things he does to keep our days so light-hearted and sweet. I shared his photo with our baby and she instinctively reached out to him as well, with a smile on her face....she knows him.

 What a weird life this is.... so messy, cluttered and out of order.

 Lord, I pray, ...order my heart today. Please give me your vision and perspective, to see this messy house, this cluttered pathway as your tool to teach me order. Order Me! my mind, my heart,  my life. Please guide my steps..... I need your help. I am so mentally cluttered.
There are so many things to think about....
You Lord,  You are my order, You are my vision, You are my guide. Thank you Lord. For each little thing, for broken lamps, for dirty faces, for cozy beds.

For many hands to train, many hearts to lead to you.

For a husband who is doing all he can and the excitement we feel knowing he will be back in our arms as soon as you plan.

For taking us through one messy time to another in this fallen world of fallen people. Broken people who need you.

May we learn each lesson you have for us quickly, the first time, so we don't find ourselves in the same place over and over again and wonder......


...... so we grow.

Thank you for today Lord..... I give it to you.


use me.

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